Feuding Couples Need Anger Management

Aleck Baldwin’s now infamous voicemail to his daughter reveals on the surface poisonous anger which seems to grip this well known movie star. However, there are deeper issues that may need to be addressed. The voicemail also reveals a man in pain, in a state of turmoil, unable to find an appropriate vehicle to express his intense emotions. What do I mean? Anger is a secondary emotion that is 100 percent of the time driven by some primary emotion like fear, disappointment, feeling used, disrespected or mistreated. These intense emotions, if not handled wisely, can end in an explosive episode as we all witnessed with Alec Baldwin.

No matter the intensity of the emotions, it is the individual’s responsibility to manage their own anger therefore the latter maybe an explanation for Mr. Baldwin’s behavior but not an excuse. Feuding couples often have children in the middle of this conflict and inevitably not only are these children hurt emotionally by the feuding but many develop problems with anger and self esteem. As a rule, couples who are involved in contemptuous divorces seem to be prone to unbridled anger and should seek anger management. This intervention may help to:

• Improve communication between couples
• Improve stress management
• Reduce the negative impact on children
• Improve conflict management
• Increase emotional intelligence

If for no other reason but for the sake of the children, feuding couples nationwide should give serious consideration to anger management. It is an ideal tool to assist in navigating the emotions associated with divorce as well as reducing the possible emotional fallout that can be meted out on children who often become collateral damage in the divorce. For an anger management provider in your area visit: www.anger-management-resources.org.

Carlos Todd, LPC, NCC, CAMF

President of the American Association of Anger Management Providers

Carlos Todd is an Anderson and Anderson Anger management provider in North Carolina

www.angerhurts.com

www.angeronmymind.com

www.aaamp.org

www.andersonservices.com

www.anger-management-resources.org

George Anderson, MSW, BCD, CAMF
Diplomate, American Association of Anger Management Providers
www.andersonservices.com
www.angertrends.blogspot.com
www.anger-management-resources.org