Building Blocks of Emotional Intelligence

Recently, an executive coaching client, who was also a physician, asked me what the experience of coaching doctors was like for me. The question caught me off guard; I truthfully told him this was something I had never thought about, so I’d have to think about it. After a few minutes, I said: “It’s a real gratifying experience. For me it’s like having offspring, who you nurture, mentor, send off to college, and watch them prosper and grow. You follow their progress and take pride in their accomplishments. It’s like being a proud parent to a large family.” On further reflection, it is why I can’t retire; I love what I do, primarily for the daily appreciation I receive from my work.

A great deal of my work has to do with helping people develop Emotional Intelligence. What I most like about emotional intelligence, or EQ, is that it’s applicable to almost everyone who is interested in improving his or her ability to more comfortably relate to others in any setting.

EQ is the ability to sense, intuitively understand, and effectively apply the power of emotions as a source of human energy, information, trust, creativity and influence. It is the ability to notice your own feelings and identify their source. Once this occurs, you have identified one of the most powerful of the body’s’ intelligences.

Experts in emotional intelligence contend that, when emotional sources are explored and freely experienced, there is the greatest opportunity to develop your unique potential and follow the directions in you work and life that have meaning. This will deepen your relationships, strengthen your leadership talents, and ignite your creative spirit.

The second important feature of emotional intelligence is Emotional Awareness of Others. This is essentially your ability to hear, sense, or intuit what other people may be feeling from their words, their body language, or other direct or indirect cues.

What is neat about emotional intelligence is that in contrast to IQ, it is not static, frozen, nor limited. Anyone who is motivated and willing to change can be taught the skills needed to increase emotional intelligence, recognize and manage anger, recognize and manage stress, and improve assertive communication. All of these skills will lead to an increase in emotional intelligence.

A Mini-Summit of Anger Management Providers

On August 25, Mike Fisher, the founder of the British Association of Anger Management, will meet with George Anderson in Los Angeles to discuss issues related to providing Anger Management services worldwide.

Right now, there are no worldwide standards for anger management providers, but Anderson hopes Fisher and BAAM will support a requirement that all facilitators complete 40 hours of training. This level of training is common in the United States for both Anger Management and Domestic Violence facilitators.

Anderson and Fisher will also discuss tentative plans to hold an international training, co-sponsored by Anderson & Anderson and BAAM.

An Open Letter to Criminal Court Judges

More and more frequently, courts are ordering anger management for a wide range of transgressions, which usually involve some form of violent act, threat of violence, or intimidation; the news media report episodes of anger related issues; and athletes and celebrities are referred to anger management classes.

Unfortunately, there is no universally accepted definition of anger management, nor are there guidelines for judges issuing anger management sentences. The American Psychiatric Association has officially determined that anger is a lifestyle issue (learned behavior), rather than a mental or nervous disorder. Therefore, an intervention consisting of counseling, psychotherapy, or medication is not entirely appropriate for addressing anger.

The American Association of Anger Management Providers, the official voice of professional providers of anger management, offers the following definition of anger management: “Anger management is a class which teaches skills in recognizing and managing stress and anger, teaching skills in increasing empathy/emotional intelligence and enhancing assertive communication”. In addition, the AAAMP defines anger as a normal emotion that becomes a problem when it:
• Is too intense
• Lasts too long
• Occurs too frequently
• Is harmful to oneself or others
• Leads to aggression or violence
• Destroys work or personal relationships

While Judges have no sentencing guidelines for anger management classes, the Los Angeles Branch of the California Superior Court has a committee on anger management that established the following standards:
• The Los Angeles Courts use a list of Certified Anger Management Providers who: 1) have all received 40 hours of training, 2) complete 16 hours of continuing education yearly, and 3) issue client workbooks and the Conover Assessment, which includes a pre and post test for each defendant, at intake.
• The court has determined that the average sentence to anger management should be 26 sessions. It is up to the court to decide if more or fewer sessions are necessary.
• The Los Angeles City Attorney’s Office, the Los Angeles County District Attorney as well as the Public Defenders all accept and use this list.
• Currently, the Los Angeles Probation Department as well as the California Parole Department, the Los Angeles County Department of Children’s Services and the Department of Mental Health refer exclusively to this list of providers.

There are professionally trained and certified anger management providers in most California Counties. To view this list, please visit: http://www.andersonservices.com/providersus.html#CA .

The current list of Certified Anger Management Providers is in the best interest of California consumers, especially given the lack of legal regulations pertaining to anger management providers.


George Anderson, MSW, BCD, CEAP
Diplomate, American Association of Anger Management Providers
Fellow, American Orthopsychiatric Association

Terry Gilbert: Poster Boy for Anger Management Providers

Terry Gilbert: Poster Boy for Anger Management Providers

Terry Gilbert, a retired teacher, spends 12 hours per week at his small anger management practice and smiles all the way to the bank. He proudly acknowledges that over the last three years, he has averaged $3200 in income per month. That’s not bad for such a modest investment.

For the past three years, Terry has used the same small conference room in the Double Tree Inn on Arden Way in Sacramento. He conducts anger management groups on Tuesday and Thursday evenings, as well as all day on Saturdays. He is permitted by the Hotel to use address as his official business address.

After Terry completed his training, which, incidentally, was held in the same Double Tree Inn Hotel, Terry immediately met with a hotel representative; he explained his interest in renting a small conference room on a long term, 6 month basis for his new anger management practice. To Terry’s surprise, the Hotel offered him a modest weekly rate: three days per week for $150. Terry was successful in quickly getting his practice recognized by the courts, probation and H.R. Departments for the Sacramento area.

Terry Gilbert sought certification in anger management as a means of supplementing his retirement. Now, he acknowledges that his success is far greater than he had ever dreamed.

Terry is a loyal Anderson & Anderson provider who initially completed the 40 hour certification, completes 16 hours of continuing education each year, and uses the materials necessary to make his classes effective, including assessments, DVDs, books, and posters. He is an active member of the American Association of Anger Management Providers where he serves as Secretary.

Terry Gilbert discusses the secrets to his success.

How I did it.

1. I took all of the training offered by Anderson & Anderson while carefully studying the reference material just as I did in my former profession as an educator.
2. I joined the American Association of Anger Management Providers and agreed to work in any way possible.
3. I followed the recommendations made in the Suggested Guide for Anger Management, which is given out in the Anderson & Anderson trainings.
4. I purchased all of the client workbooks, posters, DVDs, videos and other material suggested for use in my anger management practice.
5. I routinely advertise on Google, Yahoo and the website of the American Association of Anger management Providers.
6. I provide a good service to my clients and cooperate with those who refer to me.
7. I make referral of clients outside of my area exclusively to other certified Anderson & Anderson Anger Management Providers.
8. I make certain to include my status as an Anderson & Anderson Certified Provider in my ads, website and all printed material regarding my practice.

-Terry Gilbert, CAMF
Capital Anger Management/Executive Coaching
http://www.capitolangermgt.com

Acting Up: Anger and Stress in the Entertainment Industry

Like many people in Los Angeles, I’ve spent a fair amount of time working in various facets of “The Industry”, which is Hollywood’s self-aggrandizing way of referring to the entertainment biz. I’ve worked for film production companies, TV production companies, awards shows—I even pulled a classic Hollywood maneuver and worked at a restaurant while maintaining the delusion that I was, in fact, writing a screenplay. All of this experience has taught me a few things about the entertainment industry and the people who run it.



1) Making a movie or television show is essentially a form of calculated gambling, with millions, sometimes hundreds of millions, of dollars at stake. Since the amount of money on the line is so astronomical, so too are the stress levels of producers and financiers.

2) Unlike money, which tends to get stuck at the top, tremendous pressure and stress do trickle down, affecting absolutely everyone involved. This is true of most businesses, if someone at the top gets stressed out, aftershocks of anxiety ripple through the entire company.

3) A large percentage of people are ill-equipped to deal with the enormous stress of The Industry, often demonstrating the degree of their inability to cope through misdirected acts of proportional terribleness.

4) Anger (and the ability to express it whenever and however you want without getting fired) is the Industry’s version of driving an expensive gas-guzzler; a status symbol that is neither efficient nor practical.


5) The way a person deals with anger is a learned behavior, usually coming from his family of origin. However, it is never too late for a person to learn bad habits. In The Industry, where it is almost expected that someone will bully his underlings, people learn bad habits that, as they rise through the ranks, they then pass on to others.


Needless to say, I firmly believe companies within The Industry would benefit from a proactive approach to anger management, including offering structured anger management programs to employees on all levels. In addition to presenting material on anger and stress management, the classes should teach skills to improve emotional intelligence and increase the use of assertive communication, both of which would prove invaluable to the inherently collaborative process of filmmaking.

Fast, Easy, Cheap and Worthless

Anger Management Training

August 03, 2006
By Gregory Kyles

Fast, Easy, Cheap and Worthless

The American association of Anger Management Providers and legitimate anger management facilitators are attempting to establish and advocate for strict standards and experience requirements for anger management facilitators. It is very likely that legislation in California will be introduced in the next session of the legislature to protect consumers from unscrupulous entrepreneurs. One new, heavily advertised provider is offering “anger management professional certification” in 8 hours of training. This 8 hour training claims to equip the participant with skills and curricula in anger management for adults and adolescence. In addition, it claims that those completing this training will be able to offer organizational development and on-site training to business and industry.

A survey of related, comparable service providers include approved domestic violence providers for victims or perpetrators of family violence. The law, Penal Code 1203.098 in California calls for 40 hours of training for all approved facilitators. In addition, providers must complete 102 hours of supervised experience in probation approved program. Following this training and experience, 16 hours of continuing education is required on a yearly basis. The Los Angeles branch of the California Superior Court clearly supports comparable training for anger management providers. In fact, the Los Angeles County Courts currently refer only to providers who show proof of 40 hours of training and yearly continuing education. Anyone can visit any Los Angeles Court and request a copy of the list which is used in all courts. There are no 8 hour providers on this list.

Anyone who has or is contemplating enrolling in this 8 hour training should first contact your closest court and specifically ask if the court supports providers with only 8 hours of training. In addition, the City Attorney’s office as well as the District Attorney’s office can be contacted regarding the probability of anyone being competent to provide anger management classes with only 8 hours of training. The silence of those of us who support legitimacy in anger management services is unacceptable.

Residents of Texas are asked to contact the Commission on Juvenile and Adult Probation to alert them to this organizations’ attempt to offer this training in Texas.

Gregory A. Kyles, LPC, CAMF
Executive Director
Anger Management Institute of Texas
http://www.ami-tx.com/